Non-fiction interesting reads that may be worth checking out...

A history of God - Karen Armstrong
From Lucy to Language - Donald Johanson
Jesus, Interrupted / Misquoting Jesus - Bart Ehrman
Not a Chimp - Jeremy Taylor

Maybe...future readings?

Our Inner Ape
Why Darwin Matters

beauty of "nihilism"

nihilism in quotes because i might not be truly be a nihilist according to strict definitions of when scrutinized by philosophy students

but the wonders of it are,

genuine loss of envy (not all the time of course)
sleeping sound and feeling no moral fault for envying when i do (and this is a good thing)
not having to deal with whether i'm being a hypocrite when i envy and then reflect and suppress or release my envy
selective hearing or accepting of information
not trying to live or find "ideals" like justice, being able to take sides
not having to take a side
gaining the ability to love, because i choose my definition of love. being allowed to hate.
feelings of "peace", and allowing delusion if the ends is worth it.
and the means don't have to justify the ends.
not having to adhere to what a "nihilist" "should" be

an absurd world.

Let's see what is bullshit.

Al Gore.
The Nobel Prize.
The "Nobel" Prize in Economics.
Theology.
Linguistics on Language Acquisition.
Economics.
United Nations.

Still a white's man world. Why should we look up to Nobel Prizes. They are set up by the West and they have been given to advocates of Western ideals. Dalai Lama was awarded a peace prize. Why? Al Gore. Why? Definitely I can find reasons why they SHOULD get it. But are they the reasons why they were awarded it? Why do some Indians care that Gandhi did not get the Nobel Prize? Do Asians still have a colonial mindset where they need the approval of the white man? Many know that the Nobel Prize in Economics wasn't originally set up by Alfred Nobel. It was added many decades later under a different name but tried to associate itself closely with the Nobel, eventually becoming one of them. But the Nobel itself is not an approval by the world or of a God if any. It is given by a committee. Do the committee members have personal and political agendas?

The United Nations have enough bashers. Have they done any good? I believe so. But are they an absolute authority? Of course not. Participating in the sterilization of women without their knowing? Definitely humane.

Theology almost sounds like an oxymoron. Modern Christianity is like the superstitions they go about debunking. Of course, that doesn't say anything about whether Christianity is wrong or right.

http://www.youtube.com/user/RusskogoYazyka
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Waco_Siege
http://dosfan.lib.uic.edu/ERC/bureaus/eap/950907WiedemannTibet.html
https://www.shearmadness.com/order.php
http://www.youtube.com/results?search_type=&search_query=galkin&aq=f
dramacrazy
video4asian
mysoju
veoh
http://www.imeem.com/lololink/playlist/9QzgFZL7/best-chinese-love-songs-music-playlist/
http://www.geocities.com/~bblair/donjuan.htm
http://www.singlishdictionary.com/
http://www.imeem.com/willen/playlist/rO1LLpNx/old-chinese-song-music-playlist/
http://www.imeem.com/moonstar22/playlist/ccYbtfeW/chinese-love-songs-music-playlist/
http://www.freepdfconvert.com/

kafka trial...
what......wake up consciousness.....seek answers....philosophies....religions....religions, no you're not supposed to have more than one....but why not....slow...abusive....i'm becoming a slave...i listen to whatever you say...I BEG YOU to TELL me what to do....to COMMAND ME.......passion takes me away...a while....fleeting.....what's this....madness......no motivation to continue in this...work...no meaning....why...stop thinking.....3 ways....one almost impossible but HEARD of....total acquittal....finding of the ultimate truth..........second, delay...stop thinking......it never will come back......on hold.....third, find an answer to some extent......say that's IT, THE END OF IT ALL...and stop.....until something challenges me...........oh, confound whatever shall remind me.......

dostoevsky brothers karamazov
the grand....inquisitor.......................all is lawful, yes surely all is.....without god, there is no morality..........the very foundation shaken.......emptiness, meaninglessness..........nihilism..........replaced...with existentialism.... love for life. passions. no.....into philosophy, forget it! .....she, is my grushenka.......she comes back to me.....from wounded pride.........to revenge herself.........

dostoevsky notes from underground
thoughts.....lazybones.....that's what you are.......better stupid than intelligent........lies..... lazy...... self destruction.....changes in thought........ jumping from left to right...... destroy it all, out with it all......

drunk on music,
want to drink and make merry and die.

HDBs look so depressing.